How to Raise an Adult

Author: Julie Lythcott-Haims

This book is about parents who are overly involved in their children's lives. It addresses the fear and love underlying our over-involvement in their lives. It also discusses the harm that results when we overdo what we do. And it also discusses how to achieve better long-term results—and help our children achieve greater success—by parenting differently. I love my children fiercely, like all parents, and I know that love is the foundation of everything we do as parents. But during my years of research for this book, I also learned that many of our behaviors stem from fears; perhaps the greatest of these fears is the fear that our children will not succeed in this world. Of course, it is natural for parents to want their children to succeed, but according to research and interviews with more than a hundred people and my personal experiences, I have come to the conclusion that we define success too narrowly. Worse, this misleadingly narrow definition of success has caused us to harm an entire generation of young adults—our children.