The veiled one

I wait. My life is perfectly arranged, like a house where no one lives. I wait for night to sleep and morning to go to detention. I wait for five o'clock to get up from my desk, then return and wait for night, then morning. I wait for another job opportunity. I wait for the weekend to go to the village and wait for Sunday evening to come back. I wait for Hassan to decide what he wants from our relationship and wait for him to break up with me and disappear. I wait for a new man to start a new relationship. I wait in the car. I wait in life. I wait for breast cancer to remove my breasts and uterine cancer to remove my uterus. I wait for the days to pass so I can remove my life. I wait. As long as I am here, life is safe and worry-free. Nothing will happen in the waiting room, and here I am waiting. In the room is a screen showing a film about my life. In the film, I see myself sitting in a waiting room watching a film about my life story. I see myself sitting in a waiting room watching a film about my life story... In the endlessly intertwined films, I realize how boring this film is. Yet we all stay where we are. We repeat ourselves in the waiting. We don't want to be afraid and worry. We will stay here, sitting in our seats, watching ourselves repeat in the mirror. There is nothing outside that is worth worrying about. This may be the best thing that will happen to us in life. Why risk it? Why would I risk it? I will stay here. The best thing that happens in life is that it doesn't happen, say the waiting ones. I am waiting. My life is perfectly arranged, like a house where no one lives. I wait for the night to sleep and I wait for the morning to go to the prison. I wait for five o'clock to leave my office, then I return and wait for the night again, and the morning. I wait for another job opportunity. I wait for the end of the week to go to the village and I wait for Sunday evening to return to the city. I wait for Hassan to decide whatever he wants about our relationship, and I wait for him to separate from me and disappear. I wait for a new man to start a new relationship. I wait in the car. I wait in life. I wait for breast cancer to remove my breast, and I wait for uterine cancer to remove my uterus. I wait for the passing of days to carve my age into the lines of my face. I am waiting. As long as I remain here, life feels secure, free from worry. Nothing will happen in the waiting room, and here I am, waiting. In the waiting room, there is a screen showing a movie about my life. I see myself in the movie sitting in a waiting room watching a movie that depicts the story of my life. In this movie I see myself sitting in the waiting room watching a movie about the story of my life... In this loop of endless overlapping films, I realize how boring this movie is. Nevertheless, we all remain where we are. We repeat ourselves in the waiting. We don't want to be afraid and worried. We will stay here, sitting in our seats, watching our reflections in the mirror repeating all we do. There is nothing outside that is worth our concern. This may be the best that will happen to us in life. Why should we take risks? Why should I take risks? I will stay here. The best thing that happens in life is for nothing to happen, say the ones who keep waiting.